I don't know what kills me more... Being absolutely in love with someone I can't have or having to keep it a secret.
Thursday, August 30, 2018
Wednesday, January 10, 2018
Treadmill
Well, a couple of months ago, I got my hands on a used treadmill. I finally brought it downstairs to my "room" yesterday. I probably should have used some help, but it go down in one piece.
So apparently, the treadmill has a little odometer to show you your estimated distance each walk. Day 1 down. I'm starting with 30-minute walks. At the pace I had it at, it estimated around 1 1/3 miles I'd call that a good start. Day 1 - Done
So apparently, the treadmill has a little odometer to show you your estimated distance each walk. Day 1 down. I'm starting with 30-minute walks. At the pace I had it at, it estimated around 1 1/3 miles I'd call that a good start. Day 1 - Done
Wednesday, October 12, 2016
The Beatles - And I Love Her (Official Video with Lyrics)
Well, it seems it finally happened. I wish I hadn't deleted the post when I predicted it. She met someone... I don't think there's anything else to say.
Thursday, September 22, 2016
Friday, August 19, 2016
Broken Mirror Reflection of Only Half a Man
I am me. Or what's left. I love you. I love me. I hate us, both. No, that's not for my Cupcake. It's not for an unnamed and relinquished love. It's for the world. It's for life. The post title... It's an old alias from the Myspace days. That's what I felt like at times. That's how I feel now. Like I'm just waiting for things to end and be over.
I use to think that if I tried hard enough, that life could transform itself into something that would reward us for the pain we've endured. Or that it would otherwise make the struggle worth while.
In some ways, I still do. There's still my Cupcake. Things are different now, but there's still a strength to gain from her and (hopefully) to share with her. There's another certain someone, who won't be mentioned for now, that also has a strong ability to draw me in to thinking there's still a chance to live.
But I'm lost at times. Too afraid or too self-muted to call out. All I can do, for now, is breathe.
"I will not scatter your sorrow into the heartless sea. I will always be with you."
- Venom Snake, "Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain
I use to think that if I tried hard enough, that life could transform itself into something that would reward us for the pain we've endured. Or that it would otherwise make the struggle worth while.
In some ways, I still do. There's still my Cupcake. Things are different now, but there's still a strength to gain from her and (hopefully) to share with her. There's another certain someone, who won't be mentioned for now, that also has a strong ability to draw me in to thinking there's still a chance to live.
But I'm lost at times. Too afraid or too self-muted to call out. All I can do, for now, is breathe.
"I will not scatter your sorrow into the heartless sea. I will always be with you."
- Venom Snake, "Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain
Broken Mirror Reflection of Only Half a Man
I am me. Or what's left. I love you. I love me. I hate us, both. No, that's not for my Cupcake. It's not for an unnamed and relinquished love. It's for the world. It's for life. The post title... It's an old alias from the Myspace days. That's what I felt like at times. That's how I feel now. Like I'm just waiting for things to end and be over.
I use to think that if I tried hard enough, that life could transform itself into something that would reward us for the pain we've endured. Or that it would otherwise make the struggle worth while.
In some ways, I still do. There's still my Cupcake. Things are different now, but there's still a strength to gain from her and (hopefully) to share with her. There's another certain someone, who won't be mentioned for now, that also has a strong ability to draw me in to thinking there's still a chance to live.
But I'm lost at times. Too afraid or too self-muted to call out. All I can do, for now, is breathe.
"I will not scatter your sorrow into the heartless sea. I will always be with you."
I use to think that if I tried hard enough, that life could transform itself into something that would reward us for the pain we've endured. Or that it would otherwise make the struggle worth while.
In some ways, I still do. There's still my Cupcake. Things are different now, but there's still a strength to gain from her and (hopefully) to share with her. There's another certain someone, who won't be mentioned for now, that also has a strong ability to draw me in to thinking there's still a chance to live.
But I'm lost at times. Too afraid or too self-muted to call out. All I can do, for now, is breathe.
"I will not scatter your sorrow into the heartless sea. I will always be with you."
The Rest of the Story: Tobacco News Analysis and Commentary: FDA Bans Safety Improvements in E-Cigarettes and A...
The Rest of the Story: Tobacco News Analysis and Commentary: FDA Bans Safety Improvements in E-Cigarettes and A...: Last Monday, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) committed one of the most bone-headed blunders I have ever witnessed in public heal...
Tuesday, July 12, 2016
Wednesday, July 6, 2016
Friday, June 17, 2016
I don't enjoy life...
I don't enjoy life... I really don't. I appreciate it, but I don't know how to enjoy it. I'm too busy looking at others and thinking about how I wish I could make it better; for both them and myself. There's someone out there that I'll likely never have for myself, but I can't help but to wish I was there to make things better for. There are friends and family whose lives I wish I could help improve. And there's extended family that I wish I can just be more than who I am for.
I know... it's an old feeling and I'm far from being the first to feel this way. But if I don't let it out; I'll never be able to let it be.
A: I still love you. I really do.
R: Duuuuude, your ex is a supreme cunt. Like wow.
T: Fuck, I wish I was there to give you the right shove in the right direction.
(Yes, I rearranged that that semi-spell ART.)
My sisters... I still regret not being there for so many years of your lives. I know, as hard as I may try sometimes, that it may be time loss, but if you're reading this... I'm ALWAYS here for you. That's all four of you. Don't ever think that we can't talk because we're so far apart.
That is my rant for the night.
Who knows what tomorrow brings.
I know... it's an old feeling and I'm far from being the first to feel this way. But if I don't let it out; I'll never be able to let it be.
A: I still love you. I really do.
R: Duuuuude, your ex is a supreme cunt. Like wow.
T: Fuck, I wish I was there to give you the right shove in the right direction.
(Yes, I rearranged that that semi-spell ART.)
My sisters... I still regret not being there for so many years of your lives. I know, as hard as I may try sometimes, that it may be time loss, but if you're reading this... I'm ALWAYS here for you. That's all four of you. Don't ever think that we can't talk because we're so far apart.
That is my rant for the night.
Who knows what tomorrow brings.
Monday, March 28, 2016
Sunday, February 14, 2016
Thursday, January 7, 2016
Friday, December 11, 2015
Tuesday, December 8, 2015
Rob Thomas - Lonely No More (Video)
"What if I was good to you? What if you were good to me?
What if I could hold you till I feel you move inside of me?
What if it was paradise? And what if we were symphonies?
What if I gave all my life to find some way to stand beside you?"
What if I could hold you till I feel you move inside of me?
What if it was paradise? And what if we were symphonies?
What if I gave all my life to find some way to stand beside you?"
Thursday, November 12, 2015
Spread The Word - Save Vaping
Shared from @notblowingsmokeorg (Instagram) - If you have a #Twitter account, NOW is the time to start using it. If you wish to see a change in the grandfather date of the FDA deeming regulations, please consider posting the following 6 tweets.
@rephalrogers Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@senjeffmerkley Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@jerrymoran Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@robert_aderholt Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@Senthadcochran Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@repsamfarr Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
#notblowingsmoke #Regrann
@rephalrogers Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@senjeffmerkley Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@jerrymoran Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@robert_aderholt Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@Senthadcochran Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
@repsamfarr Urge Congress to retain the FDA deeming provision that will allow life-saving vapor products to remain on the market!
#notblowingsmoke #Regrann
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