Honestly? No, not really. I am getting better, but it feels like I'm loosing my grip on anything important to me anymore. Home doesn't feel like home. Well, to be honest, it never did, but it feels colder. Lack of work is making me feel more fucking worthless with each passing day. Local friends are looking less and less worth the effort lately. (Though, I barely have any to begin with.) It legitimately feels like there's cracks and drifts in all my relationships with people.
Now include the fact that the program that lets me go to school, while looking for work, just dropped me. So now I'm loosing some of my extra benefits AND have to stop going to school regularly. I pretty much have to research and train myself, so I can go back for testing now.
And the mornings... They're the worse. It's a struggle to get out of bed sometimes. Even today... I got up, but all I could think about was crawling back into bed, after I wrote this. I actually wrote this a week ago, in response to a message from a close someone, but I keep editing it, instead sending. I just don't want to "be" some days.
I need to find something new; some worthwhile improvement. Cause I'm starting to feel like I'm sliding back into a dark place and I don't know how I'd crawl out of that again.
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